Ramp's Broadway musical was the worst show I've ever seen. I'm still glad it exists.

Let me clarify: it's not that Ramp pretended this was high art. There were ample jokes about how stupid this show was. The audience of techies seemed to eat up the "Hamilton" parody — instead of "I am not throwing away my shot," it was "I did not throw away my receipt" — and the tap-dancing hobbits.

But I couldn't stop wondering: what the hell am I doing here? It felt like a great corporate bonding exercise for a company in IPO prep mode. And yet, they opened it to the public and invited a cabal of theatre influencers.

Jessica Vosk played Lisa Blupey, a beleaguered Etsy seller who couldn't handle an influx of orders. She was then sucked into a YouTube advertisement and had to navigate several types of bills to escape.

It's not the bills you're thinking of. There was an extended Bill-bo Baggins section, hence the tap-dancing hobbits. There was a candy-coated Billy Wonka section. (Were there not enough actual "Bills" to keep names unaltered?) And then there was Billy Zane, the sultry "Titanic" alum who came out for one steamy number.

The musical's resolution was that Blupey could fix her life problems with — you guessed it — Ramp.

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Billy Porter was the marquee star and the subject of Ramp's advertisements. And yet, he was barely in the show. Porter opened the show, then later appeared in some one-off moments and had a brief chat with co-CEO Eric Glyman. One wondered whether he was being paid by the minute.

And yes, it was messy. There weren't enough glow sticks for the whole audience. Actors forgot names. Hats fell off.

Many were suited up in tuxedos or bejeweled gowns. Many reloaded their Slacks in the moments leading up to the show. I heard M&A gossip murmurs from the audience.

The show began with an announcement that phones could be out for the whole performance, breaking Broadway standards. Then one of the opening lines explained that they wouldn't make niche musical references. Everything would stay perfectly digestible.

The show had one other perk: the actors got paid. In his conversation with Glyman, Porter thanked him for bringing back the "industrial." These were the corporate shows that actors would use to pay their bills. They have, as you can probably guess, faded away. Your boss isn't putting on a musical for you now; he's buying you a Cameo. (I asked Ramp how much it budgeted for the show — I'll let you know if I hear back.)

Good on you, Ramp. You're spending that hard-earned cash on Broadway, a sector that's sorely lacking in funding.