Juggling a baby and caring for her mom with Alzheimer’s, getting laid off brought relief

A diagnosis after growing concerns

Stephens, 45, an HR worker from Lancaster, Texas, said her mother had experienced high anxiety and forgetfulness for about two years. Once-neat habits changed, and in June 2024, her mother was referred to a neuropsychologist, where she failed the tests.

An MRI and PET scan led to an October 2024 diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease and cerebral amyloid angiopathy. Stephens said she was not completely surprised, but cried when the diagnosis was confirmed. She was glad she had moved to Dallas, particularly because she was pregnant.

A demanding daily routine

Stephens arranged for a friend to check on her mother in the morning and visited after picking up her baby in the evening to make sure her mother ate dinner. Meanwhile, she tried to prepare both her mother and son for the day before work.

Her mother resisted getting up for an adult day care center that cost $90 a day, while her son resisted getting dressed. After separate drop-offs, Stephens drove 45 minutes through heavy traffic to work, already exhausted. She described the mornings as feeling like a marathon before she even logged on.

Layoff brought unexpected relief

Stephens said she was also managing the same routine in reverse after work, then making dinner. She relied on meal kits and ready-made food to save time, though those options were expensive.

Planning care and future work

Stephens said she had savings and a 401(k) plan with an employer match. Her mother’s Social Security, retirement funds and Medicare mostly covered expenses, including day care two or three times a week; Stephens had been using her severance. The family was also considering selling or renting out her mother’s house. She made bathroom safety changes, including grab rails, a shower bench and a handheld shower, and bought her mother a more suitable bed. Stephens is exploring work related to eldercare and dementia care, runs a monthly memory café and has launched a podcast called “What Ordinary Looks Like.”